Sometimes the scariest place to be is alone. Sometimes you've been planting seeds in your garden so long, only to look up and find yourself in the desert. Sometimes the world is so loud that quietness seems almost unnatural. Sometimes the one thing you need is the thing you're most afraid of receiving.
Light needs dark, good needs evil, yes needs no, right needs left, up needs down, and you need something too, don't you? We all do. I truly believe that the moment we are brought into this world, we are seekers.
We can not help venturing beyond our own borders, walls, and limits just to see what's next. Human nature; we can't help it. We crave the idea that just around the corner, we will find what we have been longing for; that that thing deep down within us that we ache to fill, will be satisfied if we just keep going, keep hustling, keep digging a little deeper into the unknown. We yearn to fill a hole we are too proud or afraid to admit needs filling.
I think sometimes the hardest thing to do isn't to listen to yourself, but to have an honest conversation with yourself. In this life we spend so much time doing one of two things-listening to others or listening to ourselves. Don't get me wrong-it's not a bad thing to seek advice or glean wisdom from someone else's experiences just as it is not a bad thing to listen to the inner voice we call 'ourselves.' However, a lot of times, our inner voices sound a lot like other voices we've heard all day and all week or something we've read or listened to on a social media site. Sometimes the voice simply sounds like a decision we've already made but need the pretense of "listening to ourselves" to justify that decision.
Man seeks and seeks and seeks and anyone who has ever had a grandparent knows the old saying, "he who seeks, finds;" but do we?
A lot of my own problems or issues or simple lack of understanding has always been solved with me simply sitting down and being honest with me about how I'm feeling about something or someone or even me. The ability to be honest with yourself, in my opinion, is seriously lacking these days. Everyone is seeking to be the next this or the next that, promoting themselves as one thing and hating that thing they have become later when reality starts settling in- when you have a home but more rooms than occupants; when there are no more 'yes' people; when family and friends are too far away to see. When you've finally obtained that thing you've worked so hard to seek, you wonder, was that really what you had spent so long seeking.
Sometimes the scariest place is alone.
It's also the perfect place to speak...to you. Some call this act of talking to oneself "self love' or "prayer," but whatever we call it, it's one thing that never stops being relevant to any situation, phase, or season we enter into or encounter.
How can you defeat your fears if you aren't real enough to say what scares you? How do you overcome addiction if you never get real enough to say you are an addict? When do you become who you were always meant to be if you won't be real enough with you to say you are not someone else?
Growing up, it was the thing to be an individual-to find yourself and be you because there would never be another version of you ever! Now, everything is copied; originality is hard to find and no one and nothing is real anymore. So yeah, sometimes the scariest place to be is alone, but it might just be realest place you will ever be. And please don't get it twisted, being alone doesn't mean lonely, it means being found because when you find you, you are never lost or alone again!
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